A Pox on Our House: Can the Scar of Lies Fade?

Relationships are hard enough. But when the pair in question happen to be co-workers, it seems difficult to differentiate between the working relationship and the personal one. Although, I think the better question is….should we? How is a work related lie to a co-worker, with whom you are having a relationship, any different than the lie being a personal one? I mean, you are still lying to the same person regardless. This is the very question that arises between House and Cuddy in this week’s episode of “A Pox on Our House.”

Let’s begin by summarizing the situation, shall we?

House begins to realize that Cuddy has uncovered his lie, based on his intuitive nature regarding their relationship. He comes to this realization when Cuddy relieves him of clinic duty to work on his case. Based on their relationship, this is puzzling to him since she’s always making him do clinic duty no matter what is going on with a case. Bothered by the curious shift in their relationship, House feels that Cuddy may know about his lie. Thus, he turns to Wilson who pretty much thinks he’s just being paranoid and stupid for even lying to her in the first place. What Wilson doesn’t realize is that House and Cuddy know each other all too well and that House is not imagining things.

When House goes to Cuddy, he wonders why she never said anything to him if she knew of his deception. To her, she shouldn’t have had to go to him. He should have come to her to apologize for what he did. House argues that his lie wasn’t personal, because he would never lie to her on a personal level. He argued that it was “business” and just a lie to save a patient. Yet to Cuddy, the lie was just that…a lie…to her…and that’s not okay. When House suggests that she should practice “compartmentalizing” their work and personal relationship, Cuddy is clearly irritated and suggests he leaves. From the look on House’s face, he knew that he just said something insensitive. (Love how Hugh Laurie can capture a feeling or thought with just a look. He is a master at that.)

Later on House, not surprisingly, breaks the rules and rushes in to the give the patient of the week an injection because he thinks that the man does not have smallpox. The act itself was a dangerous and risky move, but that’s how House operates. When House ends up quarantined, Cuddy chastises him for his lack of respect for authority and for lack of respect in general. House feels she is still mad about the lie, but at this point Cuddy could care less about that and more about him staying alive. On that idea, House wonders that if he survives does he then win both arguments. In a scene later on, when House could be on his way to contracting smallpox, he makes her think about how silly it will be to remain mad at him if he is basically on death’s door. She does smile and tell him to “shut up.” At this point to Cuddy, last week’s situation is not as important as the possibility that House could contract smallpox and meet his demise.

At the end of the episode, the disease isn’t smallpox and House is going to live another day of driving people insane. When he stops by Cuddy’s office, he thinks all is well with them and begins to lighten the mood. However, he is taken aback when Cuddy clearly remains angry with him and pretty much brushes him off very coldly. He doesn’t understand why, since clearly when he was “dying” his lie meant nothing. Cuddy agrees that this is true, but that was when he was dying. The previous argument still exists and she has separated his smallpox incident from the lie. She exits the office leaving a very confused and dumbfounded House in her wake…not unlike he indirectly did to her last week. In other words, House won the argument regarding his rebel nature when he went into the isolation room without protective gear, undermining Broda’s wishes to keep away from the patients. However, that incident is over and last week’s still looms heavy. So, I guess House didn’t win both arguments as he may have suspected he would.

Now that the situation has been set for this week’s blog, it’s time to get down to business. Who’s right in this situation? Are they both right or are they just plain wrong? According to House, there is always a right and a wrong. What’s interesting is that the theme of the episode I think didn’t come from the POTW, but from a cancer girl Wilson was treating and the way Wilson’s girlfriend/ex-wife Sam dealt with her. Due to the smallpox lockdown, the young cancer girl’s mother gets locked out of the building and the girl is without her mom and her precious “Lamby.” The girl refuses her treatment without either of them. Sam is a bit insensitive to the situation and tells the girl rather abruptly that sometimes people have to do things they don’t want to do. Sam then becomes a terrible liar after she picks up another lamb by telling the girl they gave the false one a bath. The girl becomes angry and loses trust in Wilson and Sam.

Previously, Sam told Wilson she was taking House’s side in his conflict with Cuddy, citing that if Cuddy is expecting House not to lie and using the relationship as a rationale then she’s wrong. This makes Wilson wonder if Sam thinks it’s okay for them to lie to each other. She tells him no because their relationship is different and better than House and Cuddy’s, whose relationship to her is based on lies. I thought that assessment was a bit harsh, but I had to agree that it did hold some truth. As season five’s “Both Sides Now” proved, House’s failure to disclose his mental state to Cuddy caused her to be blind-sided when he basically collapsed in front of her. He never told her what was happening to him which may have been personal but it also had an impact on him professionally. In a sense, he lied to her by hiding his state of being from her. However, I disagree with Sam that all of House and Cuddy’s relationship is based on lies. The truth usually presents itself. And when it does, House and Cuddy are both there for one another. By the way, did Sam completely forget that this is her second go around with Wilson? At least this is House and Cuddy’s first official time around. I’d say they were already ahead of Sam and Wilson, because at least they are addressing their issues. Correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t Sam and Wilson hide theirs the first time around?

Now, let’s get back to how the cancer girl/Sam’s situation ties into the House and Cuddy situation.

When the little girl refuses to talk to Sam because she and Wilson lied, Sam understands and notes that the girl has every right to be angry. Sam’s reasoning for the lie to the girl was that they were trying to get her to do the right thing by engaging in the wrong one. In retrospect, this is what happened with House and Cuddy. House had to lie to Cuddy to get her to do the right thing and give his patient a fighting chance, but it came at a cost and Cuddy got angry. Of course, the same thing can be said of Cuddy at the end of this episode. As much as she may have been pained to be so cold to House after his smallpox scare, it’s her method of getting him to do the right thing and apologize to her and get him to understand that truth and respect are important elements to her in their relationship…so much so that she is not going to allow him to be flippant about it. It may not mean anything to him, but she wants him to recognize that it means something to her. Keep in mind that I don’t believe it was the very act of the lie that bothered Cuddy. I think she completely understands why he did it and that part was fine with her. I think she is looking for him to apologize for keeping it from her after the fact.

Basically I think this is how the House/Cuddy conversation should go.

House: “.I’m sorry that I had to lie to you to save my patient, but it was necessary under the circumstances. I’m not sorry for what I did, but how I failed to acknowledge the position in which this would put our relationship. Understand that I gave it a lot of thought before I did it, because of that reason and it wasn’t an easy decision. I understand why you would take this personally because boss or not, it’s still you I am dealing with. However, I warned you that I was going to hurt you again, because I haven’t changed.”

Cuddy: “I appreciate your apology and I do understand that this is how you operate in terms of your job. I don’t expect you to change how you do things, because that would be unrealistic. However, I wish you would respect me personally enough to come to me if you are having trouble with something. If I can’t help and you do end up lying, then I would hope to not be blind-sided later, making me look like a total idiot. I want you to own up to it and give me a heads up. Maybe then I can handle what lawsuits may arise later as a result, because it is still my job to be responsible for your insanity. If something bothers me and I think it’s important, then I would hope you would talk it out with me rather than brush it off as nothing. I would want you to do the same with me. I’m sorry I had to be so cold about this, but it was the only way I knew how to get you to do the right thing for me.”

As you all know, House has his way of manipulating himself out of a situation. I have to say that I understand Cuddy’s position. I know I may be in the minority here, but I don’t think I could ever compartmentalize a lie. House thought it was okay to have a massage therapist, who was a hooker he used to sleep with, continue as his therapist after Cuddy thought the idea was insane. He tried to brush it off by hiring a male hooker massage therapist for her. Then, she felt that he was maybe trying to sabotage the relationship. She may feel that he’s doing the same thing again by not feeling this is an important issue. To me, House’s isn’t exactly sending her the right signals. He’s frustrating her. Plus, add the fact that he was covering up Rachel swallowing the dime and where does that leave Cuddy? Not to mention, it seems that House is putting his patients always first. That’s fine when it comes to not risking his life. But now he has Cuddy to consider as well. I think that even weighs in on her thoughts. When does she become important to him? House risked his life in this episode and Cuddy was left looking through the glass watching the drama unfold. When does she take precedence over a patient on a personal level? This is definitely something hard to balance considering how much she means to him.

I’m not saying that House is wrong either. He holds the argument that lying is part of the way he operates, but he only does it when it is absolutely necessary. In this case it was necessary to him in order to save his patient. He loves Cuddy and tells her that he would never lie to her about something personal. I really believe that he’s speaking the truth there. Maybe he would have lied to her on a personal level in the past, but the situation is different now. He feels that she shouldn’t take it personally, because he didn’t intend it to be. Is Cuddy overreacting? Maybe, but we don’t know about Cuddy’s past. Since she feels very strongly about being lied to on all accounts, it makes me wonder if something in her past has contributed to her sense of insecurity on this issue. Perhaps we’ll find that out this year. In House’s mind he was just disrespecting her as boss and not as a person. Of course….is there really a difference?

Does House feel strongly about trying not to screw up the relationship so much so that he’s making bigger messes for himself? It’s definitely possible. Is he finding it difficult to own up to his mistakes when it comes to Cuddy? I think so. I don’t think it has anything to do with House trying to change but trying to grow into the relationship like a pair of new shoes. Once they give a little, things will be more comfortable.

Do I think both are being stubborn? Absolutely! But this is House and Cuddy….stubborn is why their relationship is so fun to watch and why fans love them! It’ll be interesting to see who wins this battle. My money is on Cuddy. You have to love House playing the Mars vs. Venus game in these episodes. Guess we’ll see next week if this argument finally comes to a resolution. Until then, I guess both beds will continue to feel chilly.

I would love to hear what you all think, since this situation has been hotly debated. Who do you think is right or are they both wrong? Who do you think will win the argument and why? Also, is Sam right that her relationship with Wilson is better than House and Cuddy’s? And is House and Cuddy’s relationship based on lies?

Please leave your diagnosis in the comment section. As always, I will make it a point to respond to them.

Thanks for reading! See you next week!